Terri's Peep Hut ~~ Fiction Archive

There are some things you just gotta know 'bout me and my Marie. Anybody who knows us long enough can probably figure 'em out. I tend to think of 'em as 'Rules of the Rogue' heh. Clever, huh? Well, not really, but Marie laughed when I told her it. I guess the best place to start is with the most important rule Marie Comes First.

She really always has, with me. I mean if ya think 'bout it, the first and main thing on my mind when I woke up at Chuck's was her. I'd known her for all of an hour or so, and she was front and center with me. Ended up riskin' my life for her, ended up leavin' my tags with her. My *tags*. The only damn thing in the world that I ever had that really meant somethin' to me, I left with her after only knowin' her a coupla days. She came first, right from the get-go.

'Course, that's also why I didn't stay away long. I'm sure Chuck gave me that lead 'cause there was some info there long destroyed by the time I got there, dammit but I think part of why he did it too, was 'cause he thought I'd be out and back to my old life as soon as I got a taste of the road again. I dunno if he was protectin' Jeannie or Scooter or if he was savvy enough to realize it was Marie that held my interest all along, but there was somethin' more there than 'hey, Logan, here's a lead to your past 'cause I'm such a great guy.' Chuck never does nothin' unless there's somethin' in it for him and I don't mean that in a malicious way; it's just that he has his own agenda with everythin' he does, even when it's fairly nice and unselfish. Even takin' kids in, runnin' this school you can't tell me part of why he does it ain't 'cause it's a damn convenient way to recruit a mutie fightin' force to go out and do what he wants. But anyhow this ain't the Rules of the Rogaine-users, it's the Rules of the Rogue.

Marie comes first. I'd give my life for her, sure. But she comes first with little things too. Example when I got back, I had stuff for her. I'd thought 'bout givin' her some presents when I got back, but then I realized hell, she don't have jack shit, you know? So I gave her things she'd need some money of her own, a buncha hard assets some gold, some platinum, some adamantium so that she could sell 'em if she was ever in a bind and couldn't get to the cash and, the one she seemed to like the best, a promise that no matter what I'd always be there to look out for her and take care of her. Not as good as gold, not by a long shot, but I thought it might kinda mean a lot to her since I already demonstrated that I *would* protect her, and that, if I fucked that up, like on the train with Magneto, I'd find a way to make it right.

So, Marie comes first. I can't tell ya how many times that has come into play since I've been back mostly in little ways, thank God. She knows she's number one in my life, and I think that's actually given her a lotta confidence, a lotta security. She knows if the shit hits the fan, I'm there, and she knows that I'm here for her on a daily basis too. It's those little things, the daily-basis kinda things, that are closely related to Rule of the Rogue number two what Marie wants, Marie gets.

I think some applications of this rule are fairly obvious, and the fact is she don't really ever *ask* me for anythin'. Not favors, not money, not special sex things, nothin'. She's just not that kinda person. So I kinda hafta figure out what she wants from how she acts, which usually isn't so hard. I think she just has this thing 'bout askin' me for things. She still feels kinda guilty that I did save her life and help her so much, and I've told her she shouldn't, but she does. I guess, maybe the best way to explain this rule is with the first time I was really aware of it.

It was when I'd just gotten back. We'd been hangin' out together a lot, and I noticed that Marie was nervous around me. I put it down to her havin' some time to think 'bout things, you know? She'd had a few weeks to realize that I wasn't some knight in shinin' armor. She'd hafta remember how savage I was when I hadta fight for her up on the statue. She also got a buncha me in her head, which she never said anythin' more about, but which I was sure didn't exactly paint me in the best light.

So, I tried to make her a little more at ease, jokin' with her, tryin' to show that there was more to me than the violence and the homicidal tendencies. But, after a coupla weeks, it hadn't changed, so I decided I'd better just get some things out in the open with her. Rule number one maybe she didn't realize that's really how it was, that she really did come first, and that I wouldn't hurt her. I thought about it a lot, then settled on a time to tell her and what words to use.

We went out for a picnic. It was summer but not too damn hot yet, so it was nice. And it'd be just us, alone on the remote edge of the grounds, which would be conducive to gettin' her to open up and which had the added benefit of no one bein' around to see me get all pansy-ass.

We sat down, had a bite to eat, and I opened the topic, real gently. I said I knew somethin' was wrong and I knew by her scent whatever it was made her nervous. I said I knew that some things she knew 'bout me or had seen me do mighta scared the shit outta her; I'd understand. Sometimes that side of me scares the shit outta me. But Marie, I said, I promise you don't hafta worry 'bout bein' on the receivin' end of any of that kinda thing.

Well, when I got to that part, she blinked at me once, then twice, and her jaw dropped open. Right there I knew I'd either gotten it really wrong or she was surprised as hell that I'd guessed right. While she was just gapin' at me, I told her that she could say whatever was on her mind, just say it.

When she finally got to talkin', she said it wasn't what I thought, not at all. She said that a coupla times, and I hadta prod her a little to get her to tell me what it actually *was*. The nervous scent came back, strong, at that. She got red all over and started to explain that she knew Jean told me that she, Marie, had a crush on me and that that was kinda true. She did like me, a lot, but she didn't think it was just a crush because crushes usually disappear once you find out the first ishy thing about your crush, or they just go away after a little while on their own, but hers didn't. Ishy that's definitely a Marie word. Anyhow, she said that she understood why people thought it was a crush and maybe it was but Jean also told her that she, Jean, had my heart. Jeannie told her 'bout that whole conversation in a way that was kinda 'hey, Marie, I told him you got the hots for him and he said screw her, my heart belongs to you, Jean.' Which I guess it kinda coulda been taken that way, but she just caught me off guard. I was unconscious, for Christsakes. I woke up to someone touchin' me all over and I found myself wishin' it was Marie. Thought Jeannie might figure that out, so I popped out that thing 'bout my heart without thinkin' too much I was mostly tryin' for a distraction, and it worked. I didn't anticipate the ramifications it'd have later on.

The ramifications bein' that Marie couldn't stop likin' me but felt like I was in love with Jeannie, so she was tryin' to stifle all those feelin's, so I wouldn't be embarrassed by how she felt or feel weird 'bout hangin' out with her. Embarrassed, she said. Can you imagine that? Me, bein' embarrassed by her. Christ.

Well, I listened to everythin' she said and she was cryin' some at the end, but tryin' to put on a brave face. She gave out with this real shaky smile, one that just did me in, and she said that she'd tried, really hard, not to feel like she did, but she couldn't stop, so she was just gonna try not to act like she felt, especially around me. She said she wanted me to know that she realized which way my affections went and that there was nothin' you could do 'bout who your heart decided to love. She said she'd always love me, she thought, but that she thought that one day, she'd learn to love somebody else too, so I shouldn't worry 'bout her.

I don't think I hafta tell ya that my heart was breakin' here. I wiped away a coupla those tears I always wore gloves around her and I asked her what she'd gotten from the part of me in her head 'bout all this. I thought for sure, he'd be puttin' in his two cents, givin' her some idea 'bout how things really were. But she said that she didn't 'push' him, that she knew how important my privacy was to me, so she didn't try to talk to him or feel him out or anythin'. She said it was actually easier for her that way 'cause the feelin's from the people inside her are sometimes so intense that it feels like they take her over and that's scary, 'cause they ain't usually too fulla positive feelin's for her.

That stumped me for a second, and I didn't feel like it was right to tell her to push me a little. I mean, who knew what'd pop out? Maybe he was thinkin' 'bout havin' sex with her at the time or somethin' and that could be a little much. So I said Marie, if you could have it any way you wanted, how'd you have it? She said she'd be with me, and she started to put in a 'but' and say all this stuff 'bout how she knew that couldn't happen, so I interrupted her and told her what you want, you got. It's what I want too. I know I said some things and did some things to make it look like that's not how it is, but that's how it actually is. What Marie wants, Marie gets. 'Specially if it's me.

She took that in for a second, and I think she could tell by my face that I was serious. I watched her face change expressions and it became so damn soft at the end of it all. I hey, you know what? This is also a good example of Rules of the Rogue number three Marie is fulla surprises. Anyway I leaned over and before I knew it I was kissin' her right on the lips. Naked lips. Naked Marie lips. It was good and it took me more than a few seconds to register that her skin wasn't hurtin' me. I pulled back, but she grabbed me and kissed me some more, so I hadta wait a little while longer to find out just what the hell was what.

Turns out that she felt somethin' kick over the last time we touched. She was so terrified that she was gonna kill me, that, somehow, she felt for and found the 'switch' to her mutation. She actually turned her skin off a split-second before she shoved me offa her. I must've had the biggest shit-eatin' grin on my face in history at hearin' that, but it dawned on me in pretty short order that she hadn't just held out on that little piece of info from me, she hadn't told anyone at the mansion.

She said she hadn't been sure it'd work all the time since she'd never tried it again since then, and, besides, she said she was pretty sure that she still gets the thoughts and emotions of the person in her head, and their powers, but it just don't hurt them none. Made a lotta sense to me that she'd wanna be careful 'bout who she'd get in her head and what kinda powers she'd hafta deal with. Mine ain't too hard to manage, but if she accidentally touched Scooter or somethin' well, let's just say her room'd have a sunroof. I still wished she woulda told me, though.

Honestly, I think part of it was tied to this whole thing she had 'bout lovin' me. She didn't wanna have me think she was tryin' to use that somehow, to lure me to her. And I can see how it mighta come across that way if things really were like she thought it might look like she was sayin' 'hey, big guy, I'm touchable, so come and get me.' I made sure to tell her that, from now on, she should just tell me things, and not worry 'bout how it looks, and now she does.

At the end of that whole conversation, I was introduced to Rule of the Rogue number four Marie likes sex. A lot. I mean, the girl gives me a run for my money. Not that I am complainin', oh no. We did it right there, on the picnic blanket, three times. I didn't have a condom, and she wasn't on the pill and that comes into play with some the next Rule of the Rogue but it was like neither one of us could stop.

Now, the corollary to this rule is that she gets cranky when she don't get enough, really cranky. Not to me, but she makes everyone else's life a livin' hell when I'm off on a mission for a coupla days or some shit. I think it's cute, I really do. She even growls sometimes, right when I get back. Heh.

Anyhow the no birth control thing. It introduced me to Rule of the Rogue number five. Marie loves me. She really, really does. We used birth control every time after that, but that month, the month we first did it, she was late. It was just a few days, but she said she'd never been late before. Holy hell, I was waitin' for her to freak out. I mean teenage pregnancy, her not bein' able to go to college, havin' kids with me a guy not exactly known for my sense of stability it was a lot, and I don't mind tellin' ya, I was freakin' out a little myself. Sure, there's no one I'd rather have babies with, but, hey not now, ya know? Marie still has a lot to do with her life, and I'm still gettin' usedta havin' a mate. Cubs come later, much later, OK?

But Marie wasn't freakin', not at all. She said the same thing, 'bout really only wantin' to have babies with me but now wasn't the time she'd pick to do it. But, she said, sometimes life has its own plan and if it's now for babies, well, she'd find a way to deal with it, and she hoped so would I. I said yeah, 'course I mean, you've been payin' attention to the Rules of the Rogue so far, right? - but luckily it turned out that she was only late, not pregnant. Whew, and whew again. That whole thing showed me, though, that she must really love me. If she was that OK 'bout it, that easy with the possibility of tyin' herself to me with babies and all, well, she must love the hell outta me. Which is just fine by me.