Title: The Wolverine Speaks
The Man is smart. Not smarter than me. But he is smart, and he knows how to push me back. He pushes hard, especially now that he knows I want out. But deep down he knows he can only hold me back for so long. And no matter how hard he pushes, his time will run out.
It is like this when she is near. Marie-mate--her name to him and her name to me. She is Marie and Mate to both of us - only, the man does not understand this. He fights against my claiming her in the way she cries out for. He fights the urge to claim her altogether. He even tried to leave her--our *mate*--on the side of the road like some carcass discarded from the hunt. He did not recognize what she was to us, even after she tracked us down despite having seen us in that wretched cage. I do not trust the Man.
I would not let him leave her there, and I would not let her come to harm, no matter how much pain it meant for the Man. I am not bothered by pain, and it matters little to me whether there is danger to be faced. Once I had Marie-mate with me, the important thing was to secure her, to bind her to us. But I could not, even after the danger had passed. The scent of death hovered over Marie-mate and we both were too weak to couple. By the time I had rested, he had taken over and I could not stop him from leaving her. He tore me from her not three moons after I had finally found her, and for what? What does he need to know about what the animals did to us that I cannot tell him?
I would not let him part from her for long. He did not claim her before he left, and I could not take the chance that Marie-mate would find another, stronger mate to couple with. While he found his way back to her, I would not let him befoul his flesh with the touch of another, as he had done so many times in his wanderings before. The Man - he does not understand mating; he only understands release and hollow pleasures. Marie-mate would not take him if the touch of another had been upon him.
I drove him back to Marie-mate and demanded that he claim her. Yet still he fought me. Like a fool, he waited many moons before taking her, even when he felt the call of her blood. I know that he feared me, and feared my claim on her. This is why he would not act. It was not until Marie-mate was in danger that he relented, and not until the hand of another lay upon her, not until a challenger touched what is ours – what is *mine* - that he would let me fully emerge. He still will not let me kill the man with strange glasses.
And that is his downfall – he holds me back. He does not kill his challengers, he does not assert his claim on her more than once or twice a moon, and he does not hunt to bring her meat and skins to help sustain her. He does not know how fortunate he is that Marie-mate seems to accept this. She should not have to suffer these indignities, but she has bound herself to us, and she is an honorable mate who will not leave us. Even though she seems unbothered by these failures, it shames me and angers me that the Man treats such a prized mate this way.
The way he couples with her is the worst offense he has given Marie-mate. She gives herself to him without reservation time and again, but he is timid, careful. He has even pushed her from his body at times, making her wait for satisfaction. I know he does this because he can feel himself losing control, because he can feel me surfacing. But I must fight to emerge - I cannot tolerate this treatment of her. Even now, after many couplings, even after she has shown she does not fear me, he is slow with her, hesitant, unsure.
When the animals took us, he could not fight them off. When they tore our skin from our body and poured the fire inside, he only screamed. He did not fight. Then he let them take his mind as well as our body and left me alone to defend us. He has only survived because *I* am strong, because I would not give in and I would not perish. I fought off the animals, I escaped, I nourished our freezing body with warm blood and meat from the hunt. The Man was even fool enough to spit out the blood when he took over again.
His weakness disgusts me. It is not suitable for a mate. Marie-mate has tolerated the Man's weakness and failings; she even soothes him over it. I do not know why she does not despise him for his weakness. I do. But somehow knowing that she can give herself to the Man despite this weakness warms me inside. She is truly our mate, the one meant for us. I am proud of her, and I have caught her pride in me in her scent more than once.
The man - he is ashamed of me. Instead, he should be proud, and grateful. Marie-mate tells him this too; I am certain of it. I have heard her use Man-talk when the scent was over her. She tells him to let me out, tells him that I am strong, and not a thing to be pitied or shamed by. I do not understand the Man-talk, but I know this is what she tells him. It is in her scent, and that I understand well. Marie-mate is telling him something now, and he is anxious. They can both feel me circling inside him, watching them, waiting. I will have her tonight. They both know this. Marie-mate welcomes it; the Man fears it. Even as I let him watch and be instructed when I coupled with her last, he still turned away. He is afraid that Marie-mate will turn from me just as he does but I do not know why this is so. She knows even better than the Man that she is ours. She knows her place. The way she mates with me tells me so.
"Ttttsss kkkkk sugar." That last Man-word I can recognize. It is what she calls both of us. It is her name for us. Shoo-grrr. It is fitting that the name she chose ends in a growl. I can tell by her scent it must mean something comforting, as well as something meaning strength and protection. "Nnnmtttrrr waaa hppnnn yyy lovuuu." I know that last Man-word too. The man may understand the Man-language, but I can learn it too; I adapt to my environment and conquer it more efficiently than the Man can ever hope to. I will learn to understand the Man-language but keep the true language hidden from him. It is what he rightly deserves for shunning the gifts he has been given. Scent, sound, movement, and growls are lost on him; he will only tap into the smallest part of what he has been given out of fear that I will take over. But this is to his disadvantage - I am the master of the natural language, and it does not lie like the Man-tongue can. "Lovuuu."
I do know that Man-word but I cannot explain what it means, except that I know it is the best Man-word, the highest and most pure, and it is the way Marie-mate reaffirms that she is mine. Her scent becomes addictive when she says it, and I feel warmth come over me inside - good warmth, not like the fire. Her eyes turn soft and her body becomes pliant in my grasp. I want her to say it again. Over and over. It makes me want to have her now.
"Grrrr………" The Man fights me, but Marie-mate is urging him to let go. I will let him watch again if she wishes it, but I must have her. Now. It has been too long since I last mated with her. It must be now. "Grrr….."
"Mmmmm……." Marie-mate knows that the time for Man-talk is behind us. She will speak to me now with her flesh and her scent. The face-rubbing that she has taught me is always the beginning of her talk with me. I like the scent it produces on her, and the look of contentment. It tells me that she knows I am her protector and her rightful mate. It tells me that she is safe for me too, that she will not harm me as others have, and that she welcomes our coupling. Marie-mate – she is smart too, smarter than the Man, I think.
"Rrrr……." She knows what I am telling her as well. I am ready. I am your mate. I need you. I will rid myself of these coverings and tear hers from her body. Sometimes she does not let me tear them, but tonight she does not protest. I have shown her my strength and have laid my body over hers, protecting her. She knows that the claws will not harm her flesh; their wrath is reserved for the meat of those who may seek to harm her. The Man hates the claws. I relish them. For all the torture the animals visited upon us, we did emerge with some improvements. Metal, stronger even than bone, is all the better to protect Marie-mate with. She knows this too.
The Man and I do agree on some matters. Marie-mate belongs bare, with nothing to cover her beauty. She belongs beneath us. She belongs around us. She must be pleasured, and well-cared for. We must satisfy her.
But there are things on which we differ. Marie-mate's body is lush, and fertile. She needs to be drenched in my seed; the Man's few hesitant couplings will not ensure offspring. But, I would much rather that she carry my seed. We share a body, the Man and I, but that is all. I want my child to be strong, and that will not come from the Man's seed. I want my offspring to have her soft soul, surrounded by a fierce, feral, warrior's heart.
The Man is not fierce. He is troubled, fearful, and worries over things he should not doubt. He worries constantly over Marie-mate's bond to him. He is right to think that his weakness could drive her from him, but he is wrong to think that, once bonded, she would leave his side. Very wrong. He does not understand that Marie-mate is goodness. She is warmth, and comfort. She is light. The Man - he cannot understand this, not fully. He does not know the depths of darkness and pain that I do, and cannot know the starkness of the contrast.
And that is why I must come out - not only to ensure that the Man does not drive our mate away or fail to protect her, but also because I crave the goodness of Marie-mate. Furtively, I watched, waiting to see whether I had to break my mate, to mold her, to make her submit, lest she try harming the Man or me. Sometimes, even a mate can wound, and sometimes the cut is even deeper and more jagged than that inflicted by the worst of the animals. It is the price you pay for the chance of becoming close to your mate, and I was unafraid to take the risk for a mate of this quality. But all I ever saw was her showering the Man with warmth, despite his weakness. She did not try to exploit the Man's failings to her own benefit. She protected him too, as best she could, and opened her soul to his.
I began to think that, maybe, she would give that to me instead, if I could demonstrate my strength and worthiness to her. If I could show her I was better, stronger, more virile than the Man, surely, she would choose me. And she did. She did. But Marie-mate did not abandon the Man; I think she gave him even more warmth after I came to her. This astounded me – I did not expect Marie-mate to give herself to both of us, to accept both of us.
Even more remarkable, she has taught me that there is an opposite of pain. Before Marie-mate, I did not understand that there was an opposite of pain. It is not the same as the absence of pain and it is not quite the same as pleasure or even the pure joy of the hunt. I do not know how to explain it, but Marie-mate is the source of it, and the only one who has ever shown it to me. The Man fears that I will harm her, but the only thing I have ever feared is that she will take this away from me. Now that I have known it, I cannot live without it any more than I could live without air, or water. It is good that she is well bonded to me.
"Sugar………" She calls to me. She is ready, and her scent says so. I will mate with her the way she taught me the last time, with her face to mine. I can watch Marie-mate this way, watch her body respond to mine, and watch as the warmth pours from her into me. The mouth-licking that she has taught me enhances our mating as well, and lets me get my fill of the taste of her. "Ooooh…….."
Her body is warm to the touch, and soft. When I enter her, she is ready. More than ready. It does not take long to lose myself in the revels of the flesh. "GRRRR!"
"Uuuunnnnhhh!" Her back arches in just the perfect way, driving me deeper. Yes, Marie-mate, I am here. I will take care of you. I will satisfy you.
"Aaahhhh!" So strong, my mate is, so passionate. "MMMMM!" Her blood is racing and the pounding of her heart is in time with our coupling and I feel the pull of her inside, clenching around me, drawing me deeper and deeper with each thrust until she – "AAAHHH!"
Yes. Yes. Yes! "GRRRRR! RRRRAAAHHHH!"
"Oh…..sugar…….." Do not move. You are mine. Mine. And my seed is within you now. "Ohhhhh……"
"Rrrrrr….." This part is without equal. Her soft eyes and gentle hands – Marie-mate is the only one who has touched my flesh with gentle hands. She grooms me and nuzzles me, waiting until I am ready to couple again. And she knows that we will couple more than once or twice this moon.
"Sugar……." No – wait. No – do not push me away. What? – this has never happened, never in all our couplings has Marie-mate – "Srrryyyy. Srrryyyy. Tsssss kkkkkk. Jssssttt wnnntttsssshhwww uuuu smmmmfffnnnn." No, no I do not understand those Man-words. No. You are my mate. You belong to me. You *do not* push me away. NO. You cannot – there. There. She is relenting. She is – what is she doing? She cannot mean to push me out of her body, she – no she is not doing that, but - what is she doing?
"Rrrr?" Brushing her fingers between our bodies where they are joined and then to my lips – what is she doing?
"GRRRR….." The taste of her, the true taste of her. She is not pushing me away, she is teaching me. Like the mouth licking, like the face rubbing. I was – it was foolish of me to think she would push me away. Foolish. She is a good mate. She is mine. She knows this. Marie-mate will not hurt me. I should not have thought those things of her. That is something the Man would do, and I am *not* the man. I am NOT.
"Grrr……rrr….rrr….." I am sorry, Marie-mate. I am sorry. Let me taste you again. Let me – that is it. That is it. She wished for me to taste her, and now I know why. It is like inhaling her scent, only a thousand times moreso. Intoxicating. Satisfying. Branding. She is branding me with her taste and scent and feel. "Rrr….." It is good, Marie-mate. I will mate with you this way too, by consuming your taste.
"Lovuuuu." I am sorry, Marie-mate, that I forgot who you are for a moment. It is the Man, it is his influence. I must be stronger than him. I must not let him bleed into me. "Lovuuuu." So sorry, Marie-mate. It will not happen again. Do not turn from me because of this. Please. "Sugar?"
"Rrrrr…." Must keep her close now. I cannot drive her away with weakness, with doubt. The Man does enough of that for both of us. I must keep her close. I must strengthen our bond. "Rrr…." I will grasp her tightly and hold on to her until we both breathe together, until our hearts beat in time.
I cannot lose Marie-mate, and I must see to it that the Man does not lose her either. She is ours. And she is mine. She is a good mate. A prize mate. She will not harm me. Even in the nightmares, she comes to me, and makes the animals recede. She gives herself to me even then, and she is with me when the man has long gone. She does not run scared; she lays herself beside me and runs her soft hands over my ravaged body. She is a strong and good mate – that is the meaning of the nightmares. She remains with me, even after the man flees in fear.
"Mmm……." I was right. This is the way. I will bond her to me again and make up for my weakness. I shall not be weak again. I shall not fail her again. She is my mate, and she will teach me. I am safe with her.
"Grrrr……" I will begin again, with the face rubbing she has taught me. I will remember that she is mine, and that she has claimed me for her own. When we are finished, I will link her fingers in mine, in the way that makes her smile when the Man does it. I will keep her close and I will tear limb from limb all who threaten her. I will mate with her, and make her belly full with my offspring. I will satisfy her, and I will be a good mate to her, as she is to me. She is mine. I will remember this. And I will tell her this, as she has taught me. "Lovuu. Rrr."
"Oh! Oh, sugar! Yyyy lovuuu tooo." She understands. She forgives me my weakness, soothes it like she does for the Man. She will not have to do it again, I vow that. Marie-mate is mine, and I will keep her close and keep her satisfied. I am strong. "Lovuuu tooooo. Um…..rrrrrr……." And I will teach her, as she teaches me.
"Grrrr….." Yes, very good, my mate. Very good.