Dear Dr. Love: Magneto's Letter
Don't own him, don't want him
Sure, why not?
Please? Pretty please?
Magneto's contribution to the madness......
advice columnists. I find them pedantic and generally quite trite.
However, as I am currently very limited in my choice of entertainment, I have
decided to test you, to see whether you are of any use at all.
is this: I am a superior to nearly all those by whom I am surrounded.
There was once a man, however, who was my equal. We embarked on a relationship
of an intimate nature. We stretched the boundaries of love, of sexuality,
of pleasure, control, and pain. My beloved was not willing to push
the boundaries of our relationship to its limits, though. This, plus
deeply rooted philosophical differences about the role of man and mutant
in our society caused us to grow apart.
I have no shortage of lovers (including one very convenient one that does
a superb imitation of my beloved ex) I find myself longing for the past, for
my old lover. We have grown further and further apart over the many
years since our break, but I often imagine scenarios in which we reconcile,
or in which he (at long last) succumbs to my point of view and submits to
my needs. Is there any way two men of opposing philosophy can join
together once more? How does one convince their lover to truly test
the depth and measure of that love, to forget all conventional boundaries?
And might you have any suggestions about the best positions when one partner
is confined to a wheelchair?
your vapid reply.
of the Heart (I believe this is a suitably maudlin signature, as is requisite
for your tiresome column.)